Alright, you might have just read the title of this article and been very confused. You might’ve thought something along the lines of, “What is Kai talking about this time?” Maybe you thought,“Why the hell is he still allowed to write articles anymore after that Fortnite one?”

And to that I say, please hear me out.

Elevator music, loved by… few? Has long been a slow, mellow, time filler. But I think that needs to change. Just imagine yourself in an elevator, standing awkwardly next to some stranger while some boring smooth jazz plays, when instead, you could be jamming out to some serious dance music.

I distinctly remember this video on YouTube I saw a while ago of this cop dancing in an elevator and when other people walk into the elevator he lowkey stops dancing, and then starts grooving again when he gets comfortable with the other person that gets on. Honestly, this is the type of stuff that I dream of because I aspire to be a chill guy like the one on the elevator, and I think that elevator music being some real hype-worthy stuff could seriously be a fun experience on like a two-minute trip to your next floor.

Now, I’m not saying to start breakdancing in the elevator, I don’t want you to hurt yourself (because we all know you can’t breakdance) but just be a chill guy and don’t just stand in the corner of the elevator aura farming and judging that guy ‘gettin jiggy’. Nobody likes that, don’t be a Josh. Anyways, you should join my petition in that we change the style of elevator music to something you would find interesting while you ride a flying steel box, for about half a minute. Or are you just a grubleton?